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poor old man

A poor old man was walking around the countryside, when it started to get dark. He decided to look for somewhere to stay. All of a sudden, a house appears in the distance. He arrives at the house, and knocks on the door.
The door is answered by a woman; about 50 yrs old.
The old man say's: "I am looking for a place to stay, it is getting dark and cold, would you have the kindness in your heart to let me stay a night?
The woman says yes, but he will have to sleep in the barn with all the animals. The man gladly accepts the offer.
The next morning he wakes up late and staggers around for a few minutes, trying to wake up properly. In doing so, he accidently walks into the clothes line and rips all the clothes on it. He goes and gets his razor so he can have a shave, and in doing so, he trips over a bucket, falls on to the cat, and shaves all down it's back. The woman is woken from her slumber because of all the noise. She goes outside to see what is going on. She walks up to the old man who has his back towards her and she say's: "What on earth is going on?" he is so startled that he jumps back and falls on top of a shelf full of paints. The paints wobble and fall into the stable; right on to the donkey!
The woman runs inside and calls the police.
She say's: "Hello, police? Yes I've got a maniac at my house; he has ripped my clothes, shaved my pussy and painted my ass!"

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