It’s that time of year again for the movies—the time when all those Animal House wannabes invade the multiplexes. Despite their insulting portrayal of higher education, hoards of college students waste valuable study time watching these insipid films. Of course, the studios know this, and, as they did with this film, in hopes to provide reviewers with the intended environment, they schedule promo screenings that are open to the public. It’s every critic’s worst nightmare: attending a sold-out promo in which nearly everyone in the audience is a rowdy undergraduate. As reviewers, this is likely our punishment for condemning so many of these films in the past.

I guess I still haven’t learned my lesson, because I’m now going to condemn Old School, another mindless, worthless waste of time in the never-ending tradition of Animal House. It’s better than last year’s mock of Animal House, Van Wilder, because it’s less arrogant and it doesn’t disgust the audience with jokes about dog semen and enlarged testicles, but that isn’t saying much.

Todd Philips has yet to prove himself a gifted director, and Old School won’t earn him acclaim. He hasn’t aimed for quality in the past, though, nor does he with this film. He just wants to identify with the under-30 crowd. His perception of this audience must be unusually low, as he doesn’t think they appreciate characterization and continuity. Although his last film, Road Trip, in which Tom Green licked rodents, won him popularity, so he’s probably smart to follow in that movie’s footsteps.

To the movie’s credit, lead actors Luke Wilson, Will Ferrell, and Vince Vaughn create a good comradeship through high energy and likable charisma. As always, Farrell thinks he’s doing a Saturday Night Live skit. Fortunately, his portrayal of a loony everyman works here. Vaughn is his usual cool-as-a-cucumber self, but also delivers moments of quirkiness and edge. Wilson’s always entertaining innocent-as-a-puppy persona glues the odd triple together. Too bad Old School doesn’t feature the three actors in a buddy comedy because that might have worked—or at least than this.

Wilson plays Mitch, a 30-year-old real estate broker who finds himself lonely and depressed after returning home early from a business trip and finding his girlfriend (Juliette Lewis) hosting an orgy in his bedroom. He moves to a place of his own near a local college, where his buddies, wed-locked Beanie (Vaughn) and newlywed Frank (Farrell), decide to help raise his spirits by throwing him parties. Soon, a spiteful dean (Jeremy Piven) orders their eviction. The only way Mitch can avoid being kicked off campus is to turn his house into a fraternity.

Unlike Road Trip or Van Wilder, Old School attempts to find affection in its shallow characters. Mitch is falling in love with single mom Nicole (Ellen Pompeo), who is dating slime ball Mark (Craig Kilborn). When he’s not flirting with younger women, Beanie is a loving father who shouts "earmuffs" when he wants his kid to cover his ears before he swears. And, although his inner party animal often gets the best of him, Frank tries to be a good husband, despite him bingeing at a party and running naked through the neighborhood.

Old School does earn some credit for making an attempting at characterization, but where a smarter movie might appreciate a softer side, this film does not know how to handle it. When Old School does take time away from the sophomoric humor for the sentimental scenes, it is clearly busting at the seams to jump into the next gag involving boobs and blowjobs. For instance, Mitch and Nicole share a nice, charming dialogue scene—that is until Frank interrupts, carrying a blowup doll in his arms.

No matter how hard they try, some genres will never grow up.