TV Bites

A completely different look at television from our own Neena Louise.

 

11th Annual Oskerbites

by Neena Louise

Neena is back with her irreverant look at the Oscars from her very own slightly warped, but always hilarious point of view.

Worst Dressed

Charleze Theron
Wearing a washed-out purple dress with a tail(!), Theron did her best Madonna look-at-my-boobs impression.

Runner-Up

Jennifer Lopez

Lopez was indifferently draped with what appeared to be yards and yards of bubble wrap.

Best Dressed

Cameron Diaz
For once Diaz didn't look like she was going to a high school costume party and glammed it up in a blinged-out gown.

Worst Accessory

Molly Ringwald's bracelet
The butt-ugly bracelet Ringwald sported on her forearm made it appear she was trying to emulate Xena the Warrior Princess. The matching belt buckle didn't help.

Best Accessory

Robert Downey Jr.'s blue bowtie
How refreshing!

Worst Hair

Zac Efron
Sporting a severe case of bed-head, I guess Efron thought he looked cool. He didn't.

Best Hair

Sandra Bullock
Bullock's simple, straight hair was such a nice change from some of the frights of others. Her makeup, on the other hand, was...unfortunate....more

NBC vs. CTV: Off the Podium

Though I'm not usually much of a sports fan, the Olympics are a must-see and I've always felt fortunate to live in an area that can receive both American and Canadian Olympic broadcasts. The Canadian broadcast has always been infinitely better with their copious live coverage, putting NBC in the "only if nothing else is on" category. Not this year.
For the first time in my Olympic-watching history, CTV was covering the games for Canada, not CBC. I watched NBC and CTV about equally throughout the Games and I saw little difference between the two broadcasts. It seems CTV is aspiring to be NBC (I fail to understand why, given NBC's abysmal performance this year). Both networks had too many commercials; both had a lot of "blah, blah, blah"; both had a lot of schlocky bios (though CTV had a lot more); both had too many taped events. In other words: both sucked. Not big-time-sucked like some years, but definitely subpar. Since both networks were the same, I thought it would be great that I would be able to flip back and forth between the two to watch different events. It would have been great if they had actually been airing different events! Even though there were other competitions going on, both networks often covered the exact same thing at the exact same time. Thank goodness for cable. Though CTV was still better than NBC for covering more live events outside primetime, it was still not nearly the level of live coverage to which I've become accustomed from the Canadians. They ought to bring back CBC for future Olympics...more

Strange Days on the Airwaves
What a strange television season 2009-2010 is turning out to be! All previous conventions have been thrown out the window: reruns are pretty much nonexistent; one reality cycle ends and the next one begins immediately (So You Think You Can Dance, Survivor and The Biggest Loser for example); new shows were introduced in January (Human Target, The Deep End); some returning shows aren't showing up until February (Lost); others air a few episodes, then vanish for months (Glee, FlashForward, V). Even President Obama allegedly moved his State of the Union address so as not to clash with Lost's season premiere!...more

Late Night TV Smackdown
I'm not much of a late-night talk show watcher, but I'm most intrigued by the brouhaha caused by the failure of Jay Leno's 10 pm talk show. It's been a long time since there's been such a ruckus over a show and NBC is not handling it well as it tries to save face. As this is written, nothing has been confirmed, but the rumor is that Jay Leno will retake The Tonight Show and Conan O'Brien will be unceremoniously tossed out. Though I am a fan of neither, this is just so wrong on so many levels...more

Dance, Dance, Dance
Dance is everywhere on television today. I guess many people (including myself) enjoy good dance. However, so desperate are the networks to give people dance, the "good" part is starting to fall by the wayside. Here's a rundown of some of the dance and song-and-dance shows that have been offered in the last season and a half. Though I generally stick to the Big Four networks, I'm including cable because they had some of the silliest...more

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Watch Online TV

 

Free Download: Trinity Episode 1

 Trinity College has always been known as a playground for the rich and powerful since it first opened it doors about 900 years ago. Now though the college is about to welcome more ‘regular’ students. One of them is Charlotte Arc, whose father had worked as a professor at the university and is found dead just before the new term is about to get under way. Charlotte decides to enroll at the university so she can discover the truth about her father's death. Charlotte and her fellow new students soon discover a world of sex, drugs and secret societies - including the mysterious Dandelion Club. What is hidden inside Trinity's walls?

 The first episode of the UK TV series Trinity is currently available for free download on iTunes. Download the episode and discover the secret world of sex, drugs, and secret societies that is Trinity.

Free Episode Link: http://tinyurl.com/TrinitySeason-1 

Featured Online TV Episode

Chuck vs. the Beard

Unable to flash, Chuck is left behind for a mission--but soon encounters a sticky situation at Castle as he and Morgan are captured by the Ring

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 Eureka: Shower the People

Eureka-fied baby gifts for Allison's shower push the envelope of eco-friendly design...watch

Cleopatra 2525: Quest for Firepower
Not all sci-fi has some great deeper meaning, some of it is just campy fun. They don't come any campier than Cleopatra 2525. Cleopatra 2525 aired for two seasons, starting January 2000 and ending March 2001. It appeared as the first part of the Back2Back Action Hour, followed by Jack of All Trades. Both series were notable as the first half-hour, live-action adventure series to be produced for American television since the 1970s...watch

Angel: Season 1
A centuries-old vampire cursed with a conscience, Angel left the small California town of Sunnydale and the only woman he ever loved to take up residence in Los Angeles, the City of Angels. Between pervasive evil and countless temptations lurking beneath the city's glittery facade, L.A. has proven to be the ideal address for a fallen vampire looking to save a few lost souls and, in turn, perhaps redeem his own...Watch the complete first season of Angel online.

Firefly: The Complete Series
The Crew of a starship travel through outer space after Earth's resources have diminished and forced us to look elsewhere in 2517. Captain Malcolm "Mal" Reynolds (Nathan Fillion) steers his bandit-crew through anything to keep them alive, and keep flying. Here we present the complete series in its entire feature length...Watch the complete Firefly series online.

Feature Stories

Featured Content in Television 

How To Get Cast on a Reality TV Show There are 3 ways to be cast on a reality show: Attend a cattle call; Submit directly for consideration; Know somebody who works on the show and get walked in. #3 is terrific, but it’s not necessary (really!). What’s more important is knowing how to NOT get on a reality show. Let’s start with sending naked photos, videos of yourself in the restroom and a truly bizarre mix of other attempts to get cast. Your personality is enough. Maybe...more Will a new law make your TV obsolete? The United States government is requiring TV stations to cease broadcasting analog channels. April 7th, 2009 is the current date the FCC is requiring U.S. stations to broadcast using digital signals instead of existing analog signals. With a conversion date slightly over three years from now and little publicity on the topic, what is an American consumer to do?....more Late night TV scares me.

Television News

The latest TV news from around the web

Mad Men Barbie Dolls Want to instill in your children the oh-so-American values of alcoholism, infidelity and ceaseless consumerism? Mattel has poured you a highball of easy parenting. Charlie Sheen due back on `Two and a Half Men' This Jan. 28, 2009 file photo shows Charlie Sheen in Los Angeles. Sheen was arrested in Aspen, Colo. Jerry Seinfeld set as guest co-host Thursday on 'Live!' alongside Kelly Ripa You don't see much of Jerry Seinfeld on his own new NBC show, "The Marriage Ref," which he lets someone else host. 'Lost Boys' actor Corey Haim dies at Burbank hospital at 38; coroner will determine cause The Los Angeles coroner's office says "The Lost Boys" actor Corey Haim is dead at 38. Harry Smith Colonoscopy To Air On 'Early Show' "The Early Show" co-anchor Harry Smith is scheduled to have a colonoscopy Wednesday, with live reports planned as he undergoes the procedure at a New York hospital.