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 TV Bites Annuals

OscarBites
The best and the worst of the Academy Awards.


1st Annual
OskerBites
(1999-2000)

2nd Annual

OskerBites
(2000-2001)

3rd Annual
OskerBites
(2001-2002)

4th Annual
OskerBites
(2002-2003)

5th Annual
OskerBites
(2003-2004)

6th Annual
OskerBites
(2004-2005)

7th Annual
OskerBites
(2005-2006)

8th Annual
Oskerbites
(2006-2007)

9th Annual Oskerbites
(2007-2008)
 

BiteMes
The best and the worst of the television season.


First Annual TV BiteMes 1999-2000

Second Annual TV BiteMes 2000-2001

Third Annual TV BiteMes 2001-2002

Fourth Annual TV BiteMes 2002-2003

Fifth Annual TV BiteMes 2003-2004

Sixth Annual TV BiteMes 2004-2005

The 2005-2006 Seventh Annual TV BiteMes


The 2006-2007 Eighth Annual TV BiteMes
 

(Not) The Holiday TV Listings
Annual spoof of holiday favorites.

2000 2001 2002
2003 2004 2005
2006 2007  

Salon Bronze

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 TV Episodes
TV Episode of the Week:

Firefly: Serenity

This week's featured Television show is the 2002 series premiere of Firefly. In this original pilot episode, the crew transports passengers to another planet to sell salvaged goods only to discover that an undercover Alliance agent is on board the Serenity. This show developed a huge cult following, resulting in the 2007 feature movie 'Serenity". Here we present the premiere episode in its entire feature length...Watch Now

Past Featured Shows

30 Rock: Sandwich Day - Season 2 Episode 14
30 Rock: Milf Island - Season 2 Episode 11
Highlander: The Gathering Season 1 Episode 1
Battlestar Gallactica: Season 4 Episode 1
Arrested Development - Pilot Episode
 

 Feature Stories

How To Get Cast on a Reality TV Show

There are 3 ways to be cast on a reality show:

  • Attend a cattle call;
  • Submit directly for consideration;
  • Know somebody who works on the show and get walked in.

#3 is terrific, but it’s not necessary (really!). What’s more important is knowing how to NOT get on a reality show. Let’s start with sending naked photos, videos of yourself in the restroom and a truly bizarre mix of other attempts to get cast. Your personality is enough. Maybe...more

 TV Bites with Neena Louise

Top 10 TV Annoyances
by Neena Louise
Neena returns with her top ten television annoyances, from Jeff Probst (and who isn't annoyed by him) to dramatic pauses, Neena counts them down in her usual hilarious column...
more

9th Annual Oskerbites
by Neena Louise
Shorter than many broadcasts at around 3 hours, 50 minutes, this Oscar telecast was neither exciting, nor boring. It just...was
. The stage looked very silly with its big tubey things that reminded me so much of a microscope and the opening montage was decidedly uninspired...more

Go Green Yourself
by Neena Louise

You can't watch anything on TV these days without hearing it: "Global Warming" (or its cousin "Climate Change"). I'm sick to death of it. Though the earth's average temperature is definitely rising - by less than 1 degree Fahrenheit in the last 100 years (oooh, scary) - is it due to greenhouse gases and human activity? The jury is still out on that one. Personally, I think we're giving humans far too much credit, and I believe it's just a natural warming trend the earth is going through (as it has before in its 4.6-billion-year history).

What there is no question about is how ridiculous the media hype and all the celebrity-driven nonsense is about "going green"...
more

 TV Notes

Featured online TV:

TV is now online, check out some of the latest offerings you can find online.  We will be highlighting some of the best of online TV in this space.

Even the big channels are now streaming their content online. You can watch some of your favorite shows at your leisure.

ABC is streaming full episodes of their most popular series Grey's Anatomy, Desperate Housewives, Lost, Ugly Betty, Six Degrees, and The Nine. ABC is using flash video to stream the episodes . The latest four episodes of each series are available. The episodes have 30 second breaks for advertisements which can not be skipped.

Launch the ABC.com Full Episode Player

CBS is streaming full episodes of several series like CSI, CSI: Miami, CSI: NY, How I Met Your Mother, Jericho, NCIS, The New Adventures of Old Christine, Numb3rs, Shark, Smith, Survivor and The Unit) with it's new service called Innertube. Innertube allows users to stream full episodes with Windows Media Player or Real Player. The video can be viewed fullscreen, embedded in the CBS webpage or in Real Player. The episodes contain advertisements that can not be skipped (unless you are using Real Player to watch the episode).

Launch Innertube to watch full streaming CBS episodes

FOX is streaming full episodes of Bones, Justice, The Loop, Prison Break, Standoff, Talkshow (with Spike Feresten), Til Death and Vanished with it's streaming service "FOX on Demand". The episodes are streamed using MovieNetworks Quantum Movie Player.

Launch FOX on Demand

NBC  is also streaming its shows, including new shows like Bionic Woman, Chuck, Friday Night Lights, Heroes, Las Vegas, The Office, Life, and more.

Launch NBC Video Player

The CW doesn’t have as many programs to offer as the other networks, but nearly every show is available for streaming, including “Everybody Hates Chris”, “Girlfriends”, “All of Us”, “The Game”, “Pussycat Dolls Research Next Doll”, “America’s Next Top Model”, “Beauty and the Geek”, “Supernatural”, and “One Tree Hill”.

Launch The CW Video Player

MTV is streaming original content through two broadband video channels. MTV Overdrive ( www.mtv.com/overdrive ) has extensions of on-air programs such as Laguna Beach and the Real World/Road Rules Challenge, as well as additional footage from the VMA's and other signature MTV events. Meanwhile, you can whet your appetite for student-produced films, music, and animation at mtvU (www.mtvu.com), an online spin-off of MTV's closed-circuit college network.

You can also watch live TV at several online services. The following sites offer streaming channels such as foodtv, ESPN, and more.

EN Live Television powered by live-online-tv.com: Quick front page with listings of some of the most major channels available online.

wwiTV: Some 1800+ Channels listed from 50+ countries available. This is more of a directory service than an online player.

 Feature Stories
Will a new law make your TV obsolete?
The United States government is requiring TV stations to cease broadcasting analog channels. April 7th, 2009 is the current date the FCC is requiring U.S. stations to broadcast using digital signals instead of existing analog signals. With a conversion date slightly over three years from now and little publicity on the topic, what is an American consumer to do?....
more

Late night TV scares me.

 Television News
Sex And The City: Sarah Jessica Parker denies rift with co-star

"There was no script, there was an idea. When it didn't happen, we all went on ... Two years ago I had this instinct we should revisit the idea. Our audience grew after we went off-air so the audience created the opportunity."

Sarah Jessica Parker has denied rumours that ...

Taylor Hicks to play Teen Angel in Broadway's `Grease'

"Idol"-tested skills. The Alabama-born crooner's run ends Sept. 7. He'll be the latest "Idol"

In this Dec 16, 2007, file photo American Idol winner Taylor Hicks performs on stage during Asian Idol in Jakarta, Indonesia. Ellen DeGeneres, girlfriend plan to marry

Ellen DeGeneres is putting the California Supreme Court ruling in favor of gay marriage into action -- she and Portia de Rossi plan to wed, DeGeneres announced during a taping of her talk show. Beyonc To Become A Desperate Housewife?

"They've already agreed to give Beyonce a cameo appearance. But (we're) hoping that (she) could be written in for a recurring role, or possibly even a permanent one."

R+B superstar Beyonce Knowles is reportedly in talks to join the cast of TV hit Desperate Housewives. Fox cuts back on 'Idol,' has just 2 new shows

Fox will bring only two new series on the air in the fall, traditionally its slow season, but plans flashy two-hour season premieres of four programs during the same August week as the Democratic National ...

 TV Bites Archives
Hype of Epidemic Proportions
It seems everything is an epidemic
these days...
more
Seasonal Blues
Last season ended on a down note for Neena...more
Nothing Lost
I admit it. I was a Lost fan.
For all of one season...
more
To Be Continued
Unbelievably Unnecessary Gimmicks
The Winter Olympics: U.S. vs Canada
The weirdest Winter Olympics ever
It's Really Summer
The dearth of summer programming
Realer than Real
Adding soft porn to the reality glut.
Entertainment Businesses' Motto:
 "Bugger Off"
Mini-me TV
The new mini seasons
The Decline of TV Guide
What has happened to TV Guide?
Network Boardroom Speak
What the memos must look like
Destroying a Memory
The digital removal of the World Trade Center
Summer Reality
Watch if you dare!
Tsunami Sweeps Good Taste Out To Seas Breaking The Law...It's A Good Thing
Martha Stewart's Saga
The Swan
An Ugly Series
Fatty Fatty Two-by-Four
Puh-leeze....
The Boob Tube
Breasteses!
Where's The Show
The New Season Sucks
The Jiggle Factor
Spike TV
Where Were You When the Lights Went Out
The New Reality
With a corresponding loss in IQ Points
The New Reality
American Idolotry II
All War,  All The Time
Exploitation?
Rip-off Artists?
Protecting Whose Interests?
90 Minutes Of Tedium
Whats The Point
Dating Shows
Mindless Drives
CSI: Miami
I See Dead Series..
Bah Humbug!
Too much Christmas Hype
Sniper
Sensitivity, Or Censorship?
September 11th Thoughts
One Year Later
American Idolatry
Been Sucked In?
The New Season
Everything Old Is New Again.
Surreality TV
I wonder just how "real" reality television is.
Survey Says
Where do these surveys come from?
Tick Tick
Too Much Clutter
Rerun Wasteland
TV's Summer Rerun Wasteland
Odious People
People That I Wouldn't Care if I Never Saw on TV Again
Unlucky 13
13 first-run episodes 
per year?
And the winner is...
I'm already sick of the awards
Critical Mass
Critics Schmitics
Destroying a Memory
A Disturbing Trend

Anthrax, Shmanthrax!
Media-driven hype ?

This Just In 
The news is no longer new.
The Decline of TV Guide
They want how much per issue?
T.V. Cyberia
TV Websites are a virtual wasteland.
Crime and Punishment
"Cops-and-robbers" shows are back. Should they be?
If I were king of TV.
A television wish list.
The 2004 Olympic Games
No Perfect Scores Here
English as She is Spoke
English subtitles for people speaking English
Where Were You When the Lights Went Out?
I need a priority check.
Stop The Presses
Repetitive exploitive WTC footage must stop.
What's New Copycat? - WHOAAAA!!
Over cloning of television shows leads to in-bred defectives
I'm OK, You're OK
Political correctness is out of control.
Reality...What a Concept!
The phenomenon of reality TV.
What's the Final Answer?
The intriguing success of Who Wants to be a Millionaire?
The Incredibly  Shrinking Credits 
The deplorable practice of meddling with credits.
NBC's Olympic Non-Coverage
The 2000 Olympic Summer Games: NBC should be ashamed.
La-La-Lame
The decline of television theme music.
Bugged by Bugs
Why station and network identification bugs should be exterminated.
TV Unclothed
Naked skin is not pornography!
Curses!
So-called "swear words" are no longer taboo.
75 Channels and Nothing On
The decline of cable television.
The Emaciation Trend 
The skinny on the skinny.
A Word from our Sponsors
A sampling of ads that go thud
Click This
Should television be directing people to the Internet?
You Talk Too Much
TV talk shows aren't what they used to be.
TV or Not TV?
Those that don't watch must tell.
If It Bleeds, It Leads
Is TV too violent? Only on the news.
It's Not My Fault
How television is fueling the "nothing is my fault" attitude.
Who Wants to Trash a Millionaire?
Who Wants to Marry a Multimillionaire?: TV sinks to new depths.
Sweep it Away!
Making the case for a sweeps-free season.
It's Saturday Morning. Do You Know Where Your Kids Are?
What happened to Saturday morning cartoons?
Top 20 TV Promo Turnoffs 
A primer on how not to attract a crowd.
Why Network TV Bites
At least it's free.
Vote for Me, I'm on TV
Television news' embarrassing election coverage.
Only $19.95! But Wait! There's More!....
Network television's incessant hawking of merchandise.
Oprah:
What Hast Thou Become? 

The rise and fall of Oprah Winfrey.
Viewer Discretion advised
Who should be issuing content warnings?
Don't Try This At Home
Pulling the rug out from under home improvement shows.
Network TV's Desperate Days
All the hype in the world can't save bad television.
Tempted? Don't Be!
Temptation Island? Bah! More like Tempted to Bash the Television.
CA$H TV
Network greed at its finest.
Big Brother? Oh, Brother!
Big Brother - the worst of reality television.
Critical Mass
Does what critics say make a difference?
People That I Wouldn't Care if I Never Saw on TV Again
The most odious people on television.
If A Writer Strikes and No One Cares, Does it Make a Sound?
Viewer apathy strikes the writers' strike.
Now is the Season of Our Discontent
Why the television season starts in the Fall.

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