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TV Bites With
Neena Louise |
3rd Annual OscarBites
by Neena Louise
Worst Dressed
Jennifer Connelly
I'm not sure if it was that she's too bosomly-challenged to hold up a
dress like that or if it is her prominent slouch, but that ill-fitting
number made her look drab and uncomfortable.
Best Dressed
Jennifer Lopez
That dress was great (as always on the lovely J-Lo), but that hair has
to go...has anyone told her this is not the 1960s?
Worst Accessory
Ananda Lewis' ridiculous spinny flower thing that she was sporting on
her wrist.
Best Accessory
Diane Warren's piano-shaped clutch purse.
Worst Acceptance Speech
Halle Berry (Actress, Monster's Ball)
Her blubbering, self-congratulatory and totally insincere
"speech" reminded me that she is, indeed, a product of the
beauty pageant circuit (and it shows). This fake-blubbery-mess-thing
seems to be a trend for those in this category, so I have a message
for future nominees: You might win, so make like a Boy Scout
and be prepared for crying out loud!
Best Acceptance Speeches (tie)
Julian Fellowes (Original Screenplay, Gosford Park)
His enthusiasm was infectious.
Runner Up
Richard Taylor (Visual Effects, Lord of the Rings: The
Fellowship of the Ring)
He was the only one to thank movie-goers (without whom there would be
no Oscars).
Worst song presentation
Faith Hill, "There You'll Be" (Pearl Harbour)
I've never heard her hit so many wrong notes in a single performance.
Truly appalling.
Best song presentation
Enya, "May It Be" (Lord of the Rings: The
Fellowship of the Ring)
Hauntingly beautiful.
Worst acknowledgement
Joan Rivers (in the pre-Oscar show) introducing Jim Broadbent as
"another Australian" (Broadbent's surprised
"No....English!" was one of the funniest lines of the
night.)
Best acknowledgement
Whoopie Goldberg's: "Look! It's the Smith Family: Will, Jada and
Maggie" (who were all sitting in a row).
Least deserving of an Oscar nomination
Nicole Kidman (Actress, Moulin Rouge!)
Oh, puh-leeze.
Most deserving of an Oscar nomination
Sissy Spacek (Actress, In the Bedroom)
Outstanding performance. Her richly nuanced performance was so much
more deserving than the over-the-top histrionics of Halle Berry - both
onscreen and on Oscar night.
Least deserving of an Oscar
Halle Berry (Monster's Ball)
She totally didn't deserve it...I suspect she only won because people
liked seeing her naked.
Most deserving of an Oscar
Ron Howard (Director, A Beautiful Mind)
Outstanding...it shouldn't have taken so long for this genius to win
an Oscar.
Runner-up
Randy Newman (Original Song, "If I Didn't Have You", Monsters,
Inc.)
After fifteen nominations and no wins, the Susan Lucci of the Oscars
finally gets his statue.
Least Surprising Winner
Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring
Was there ever any doubt?
Most Surprising Winner
Jim Broadbent (Supporting Actor, Iris)
He definitely deserved it, but with co-nominees like Ben Kingsley and
Ian McKellen, it was still a surprise.
Worst Presenter
Woody Allen
He started off great and funny, but deteriorated into this rambling,
bumbling fill-the-void blathering that made me turn to the Weather
Channel.
Best Presenters
Ryan Phillippe and Reese Witherspoon
Not only were they amusing, they were also the only ones that didn't
look like they were simply reading off the teleprompter.
Worst reaction of a winner
Denzel Washington (Actor, Training Day)
He looked positively smug, then made it worse by putting
himself in the same realm as Sidney Poitier. Sorry, Denzel buddy,
you're not even on the same planet as Poitier and you never will be
(but you do look good!).
Best Reaction of a Winner
Akiva Goldsman (Screenplay Adaptation, A Beautiful Mind)
His borderline-hysterical laugh followed by the borderline-hysterical
"I'm terrified" was very endearing.
Biggest Loser
Amélie
Five nominations and not a single statue. They was robbed!
At a butt-numbing 4 hours, 17 minutes, this was the most tedious,
boring and appalling Academy Awards ceremony I've ever witnessed. I've
come to call these the Guilt and Pity Awards rather than the Oscars.
Some awards were not given to those that deserved them, but rather to
those that had been snubbed (or had been perceived to be snubbed) in
previous years. It's not right. This practice renders the Oscars
worthless and is unfair to those that actually deserve it. Then, the
make things even more distasteful, all the references to September
11th rang insincere and self-serving and I was appalled that the
"tribute to New York locations" did not have one single
image of the Word Trade Center. Some tribute. Add in Whoopie
Goldberg's lame jokes, the dreadful swing-around-the-rosies camera
work (could anyone read the names during the salute to movie score
composers?) and stupid snips of celebrities explaining what their
favorite movie is and why (the words "who cares?" leapt to
mind) and you have one colossal waste of time.
There were bright moments (okay, there were two): The Circque du
Soleil was fabulous and the Ben Stiller/Owen Wilson skit was very
funny. Bottom line: the Oscar broadcast could use a little more
levity, a lot less self-importance and a whole lot fewer commercials.
First
Annual OscarBites
(1999-2000)
The best and the worst of the 1999 Academy Awards.
Second
Annual OscarBites
(2000-2001)
The best and the worst of the 2000 Academy Awards.
For those that missed them:
2001-2002 Oscar Winners
Picture - A
Beautiful Mind, Brian Grazer, Ron Howard
Director - Ron Howard, A
Beautiful Mind
Actor - Denzel Washington, Training Day
Actress - Halle Berry, Monsters
Ball
Supporting Actor - Jim Broadbent, Iris
Supporting Actress - Jennifer Connelly, A
Beautiful Mind
Cinematography - Andrew Lesnie, The Lord of the Rings: The
Fellowship of the Ring
Editing - Pietro Scalia, Black
Hawk Down
Visual Effects - The Lord of the Rings: The
Fellowship of the Ring, Jim Rygiel, Randall William Cook,
Richard Taylor, Mark Stetson
Documentary Feature - Murder on a Sunday Morning,
Jean-Xavier de Lestrade, Denis Poncet
Documentary Short Subject - Thoth, Sarah Kernochan, Lynn
Appelle
Live Action Short - The Accountant, Ray McKinnon, Lisa
Blount
Animated Short - For the Birds, Ralph Eggleston
Sound - Black
Hawk Down, Michael Minkler, Myron Nettinga, Chris Munro
Sound Editing - Pearl
Harbor, Christopher Boyes, George Watters
Foreign Language Film - No Man's Land
(Bosnia-Herzegovina), Danis Tanovic
Original Screenplay - Julian Fellowes, Gosford Park
Adapted Screenplay - Akiva Goldsman, A
Beautiful Mind
Original Score - Howard Shore, The Lord of the Rings: The
Fellowship of the Ring
Makeup - Peter Owen, Richard Taylor, The Lord of the Rings: The
Fellowship of the Ring
Costume Design - Catherine Martin, Angus Strathie, Moulin
Rouge!
Art Direction - Catherine Martin, Brigitte Broch, Moulin
Rouge!
Original Song - "If I Didn't Have You", Randy Newman,
Monsters,
Inc.
Honorary Oscars - Sidney Poitier, Robert Redford
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