Top 10 TV Annoyances
by Neena Louise
10. "Coming Up" Banners
It is so irritating when a
big, obnoxious banner proclaiming what is coming up covers up a subtitle. I
don't give a rat's ass what's coming up. I just want to see who it is that's
speaking or be able to understand what someone speaking another language is
saying during the program I'm watching right now.
9. Jeff Probst Counting to "One" on Survivor
How many times have you
heard Probst say during Tribal Council "First vote: So-and-so. That's one vote
for So-and-so."? Most people over the age of 3 can count to one. Even two! Just
how stupid does Probst and/or Survivor's
producers think the viewing public is?
8. Zooming / Shaky Camera Work
I guess this is supposed to
make everything look so real and dramatic. In actuality, it's annoying and
7. Repetitive "Viewer Discretion Advised" Warnings
I can understand the
warning at the beginning of the show and, perhaps, after the first commercial
break. But after every single commercial break? Puh-leeze! I don't know if these
are government regulations or the networks being paranoid about being fined, but
if you don't know what you're watching isn't suitable for children after the
first few minutes, you: a) are a lousy parent; b) are too stupid to be watching
TV and need to read a book instead.
Though not such an issue
this season, given that the writers were on strike for a large chunk of it,
Sweeps still needs banning. "Good" episodes should air throughout the season,
not just during Sweeps.
5. The Dreaded "To Be Continued"
Two-part episodes are lame
and rife with "whatever". I'm getting to the point that I simply don't bother
with the second part of an episode. Or, if I know in advance it is a 2-parter,
I'll skip the first part altogether. It'll be recapped extensively at the
beginning of part 2 anyway.
4. Idiotic Running Times
If every TV show ran from 8:59 to 10:02 (or whatever),
this wouldn't be an issue. But with so many eccentric running times on different
networks, how can anyone watch live TV anymore? I'm getting so sick of missing
the first/last couple of minutes of a show that, if it is running at a stupid
time, it's TiVo to the rescue.
3. Repeating What Happened Just Before a Commercial Break
When are the networks going
to get it? Just because viewers have short attention spans does not mean we have
no memories. We really don't need a "recap" of what happened two minutes ago.
2. Recap Episodes
Again with the "Viewers
have no memories" attitude from the networks! With so many repeats this season,
the very last thing in the world anyone wants to see is a "new" episode that is
actually little more than a clip show, recapping all the repeats you've already
been forced to endure (sometimes several times). Enough already.
1. The Dramatic Pause (and its close cousin: The Dramatic Pause Before
With so much reality TV
jamming the airwaves, the stupid "dramatic pause" is anything but dramatic. How
many times have you heard "And the [chosen one] is" ... pause ... cue music ...
pause ... commercial! You can see
commercials coming a mile away and can leave the show a few seconds before and
not bother returning until a few seconds after (because they'll repeat what
happened just before the commercial anyway). Idiots.